


Finding Your Way Back Home

by BeBraveM



Category: The Brave (TV 2017)
Genre: F/F, F/M, Family, Friendship, Humor, Hurt/Comfort, Jealousy, Loneliness, Love, M/M, Nightmares, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Team as Family, Trust, Trust Issues
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-08-11
Updated: 2020-08-11
Packaged: 2021-03-06 02:15:11
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 4,133
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25835599
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BeBraveM/pseuds/BeBraveM
Summary: This is my first fanfiction ever. Feedback is always welcome. I hope you like this story. I'll be honest and tell you I don't know exactly where this story is going but I hope you stick around for the ride. I need to thank my amazing beta Roo for encouraging me to put this out there. You're the best. Enjoy!
Relationships: Amir Al-Raisani & Jasmine "Jaz" Khan
Comments: 4
Kudos: 37





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first fanfiction ever. Feedback is always welcome. I hope you like this story. I'll be honest and tell you I don't know exactly where this story is going but I hope you stick around for the ride. I need to thank my amazing beta Roo for encouraging me to put this out there. You're the best. Enjoy!

Jaz had resolved at some point on the flight home to get over herself. It'd been weeks now since she'd been cleared, and when she was working everything was fine. Great even. But in the downtime things were harder. And coming back stateside meant that there would be a lot of downtime. Alone. 

They still had two weeks of debrief to get through in D.C., so technically there was still time. But she had to talk to him eventually if this had any chance of working out. 

So that was how she found herself outside his hotel room, rocking back and forth, almost shyly, her stomach in knots. 

***

Amir sat in his hotel room trying to figure out how he got there. He'd been alone for most of his adult life, but the thought of being alone for the next few months scared him. This is ridiculous, he thought. I can take down terrorists but can't spend a few months alone. 

He never wanted to be on a team, he didn't want to ever feel again what he felt after his sister was murdered. When he first joined the team he kept to himself, it was safer that way. But slowly they had chipped away at the wall he'd spent a lifetime building. They became his family, and the thought of not seeing them everyday was frightening. He needed to figure this out. 

Little did he know the answer to his problem was waiting on the other side of his door.

***

Jaz almost chickened out. A door opened somewhere down the hall, and she actually startled. But she had to do this. Avoiding it wasn't going to make it go away. So she lifted her hand and knocked on the door, thinking of the last time they'd come home and she was standing in front of a door just like this one, only Adam had been on the other side of it. 

They'd danced around each other for all of their leave, pushing and backing down in turns–and it had been completely maddening. She needed to get over it–over him–and the only way to do that was to move forward. God help her. Jaz actually fidgeted while she waited. 

***

As Amir sat on his bed, he heard a knock on his door. He was fairly certain it was Top, but when he opened the door and he saw Jaz it was hard to keep the surprised look off his face. He opened the door more widely and let her in. They stood awkwardly in the middle of his hotel room. Finally, at the same time they both spoke:

"I need your help," said Jaz. "What's going on?" Amir asked. They both laughed. 

Okay, Jaz is asking for my help, my world has definitely changed. "What do you need help with?" 

He noticed how fidgety she was so he knew this was serious. He also knew how hard it was for Jaz to ask for help. The fact that Jaz was asking him filled him with hope. Hope that he was finally accepted by the one who been the hardest on him. 

***

"I um ... God, okay. I was wondering if maybe you would like to go to dinner with me?" That proposition was at least easier then the one she really needed to ask him about. She still didn't know how to ask without totally freaking him out. Look at me, I'm a trained sniper, a woman in an elite group that chews up and spits out bad guys for a living, and I can't ask a friend for help. 

"Yeah, sure, okay? When and where?" Is this a date? I thought she was interested in Top. Oh my god, I just said yes to a date with Jaz. Top is going to kill me. Maybe that is Jaz's plan. 

Despite Amir's easy agreement Jaz could sense his confusion. She couldn't blame him. She had just technically, kind of sort of, asked him on a date. 

"Look, I just ... you're safe." It didn't really explain anything, but it made sense to her. "I can't keep leaning on Top. Not that this is a rebound or anything ... you know what, I'm just going to stop talking." He'd said yes so why was she rambling and making a fool of herself? 

Amir wondered what the hell that meant. You're safe? Why would I be a rebound from a relationship that never came to be? One thing's for sure, Jaz wants to move on from her feelings for Top. 

"First thing you need to do is calm down. Second, I'm going to need more information. Now if you really want to go out for dinner, so we are on neutral ground, we can do that. If you want more privacy we can talk here. I can tell this is important to you and I'll help anyway that I can." Amir's protective and caring nature was starting to come out. His friend was hurting more than he ever thought.

Jaz flushed. She wasn't used to letting people take care of her. She'd fought tooth and nail her whole life. She raised herself, which is why this was so hard. But this she knew she couldn't do alone. Jaz took a deep breath, half in relief and half steeling herself for the next part of the conversation. "Since Iran I have had a hard time with some stuff. Nothing job related. I mean, I was cleared for duty. But other stuff."

"Jaz, I know you haven't felt comfortable telling us the details of your time with Arthur. I know what men like Arthur are capable of. More so than anyone else on our team. Every time I went undercover I had to turn a blind eye to the way they treat women. So, I think I have a way to help you, but this will take time. Here's the plan, you and I will spend our leave together and work on getting you back to the old Jaz. What do you say? Are you up for a challenge?" Amir realized that this wasn't about getting over her feelings for Top. This was about being able to move forward from the trauma of a sexual assault at the hands of that bastard. Amir tamped down his anger, knowing that Jaz killed the man who did this to her. He can't hurt anyone else anymore. 

Jaz smiled and nodded. She shouldn’t have been surprised. Of course Amir could read her from a mile away. He'd always had a way of doing that. “You'd really want to spend all that time with me annoying you?” Jaz said that with a grin on her face and relief in voice.

“Well, when you put it that way.” 

Jaz punched him in the arm. “I know we got off to a rough start, but I’d like to think we've become close friends. I know this will lead us to explore your new personal boundaries, but it will also help me explore mine as well.” 

“Jaz, I haven’t been with anyone since my sister died. Full disclosure, I’m bi-sexual. And as you know, being a Muslim, bi, and a man in the military is a non starter for me when it comes to dating or just sleeping with someone.” Now it was Amir's turn to be nervous. He’d never told anyone about this part of himself. He hoped and prayed that Jaz would still see him as the same person and that she would be willing to continue with his plan. He needed this as much as she did–maybe even more so.

Jaz blinked in surprise, not expecting Amir's admission. She could tell by his shift in demeanor that he was a little uncertain about his confession. “You know, Elijah was gay. It doesn’t bother me.” She reached for his hand, squeezing gently. “Does anyone else know? Does your family know?” 

Amir took a breath. “The only person I’ve ever told was my sister. All she said was, 'Okay, What's next?'" Amir thought back to all of those late night talks with his sister and it brought tears to his eyes.

Jaz saw that. “We'll do this together. Family first," she said. 

The prospect of having somewhat of a plan for leave, one that didn’t involve running far away and shutting everything out, was a relief. And honestly for Jaz this was kind of thrilling, just what she needed. Oh, we need dinner reservations. “Okay, so how about we both freshen up and meet in the lobby in an hour. I’ll make reservations at my favorite spot," Jaz said.

“Sounds good. Looking forward to our non-date dinner,” Amir said in a way that he knew would make Jaz laugh.

On cue, Jaz laughed and shook her head. She walked to the door and said, “See you in an hour, Amir.” 

***

Amir and Jaz both tried to figure out what to wear for their non-date dinner. 

Amir, not knowing where they were going, chose a nice pair of jeans and his purple dress shirt. He decided to wear a black suit jacket just in case. Casual but not too casual. 

Jaz wore a fun, red maxi dress with some flowers on the bottom half. She opted to wear her hair down. She chose flats because Amir was just a couple inches taller than her. Some light makeup and she was ready to go.

They both took deep breaths and headed out. 

***

They met up in the lobby, and they were both completely breathless when they saw each other. Jaz suggested that they walk from there. 

It was a quick ten minute walk to the restaurant, with Jaz’s arm wrapped around Amir's. They arrived at the place Jaz had chosen and it was beautiful, casual but classy at the same time–the perfect place for their non-date dinner. 

As they ate and talked, they both realized how much fun they were having with each other. 

“I’m thinking we should travel the states first and spend one on one time together," Amir said. "I'd like to meet Elijah. If you’d be okay with that? He’s a big part of who you are.”

Amir knew that at some point he would have to take Jaz to meet his sister. 

Jaz looked up in surprise. The team had spent a fair amount of time talking about past deployments, people who had retired, and the ones who had never made it back home. But she still hadn't expected this. “You really want to do that? Meet Elijah?” Jaz asked Amir while trying to keep her heart from jumping out of her chest. She was so excited for her best friend to meet Amir. She knew without a doubt that Elijah would have loved Amir.

“Of course. He’s family to you and the team. I want him to know that I’m taking care of his little sister now. I also know that a visit with him will help you heal and give you some peace. I’m thinking I could whip up some of Elijah’s favorite dishes and the three of us can have a picnic together. You can tell me all about the brother I wish I could have met. And the one I would trade places with in a heartbeat, if it meant you could have him back.” Amir took a breath, hoping that he hadn't overstepped. He saw tears flowing down Jaz's cheeks and decided to move his chair to be closer to her. With one hand he wiped her tears, with the other he held her hand. 

“Who knew you were such a sweetheart?” Jaz said, chuckling softly while trying to tamp down the sudden wave of emotions flooding her. “I would love that. Elijah will really enjoy getting to know you and your cooking. I’d love to get to know more about your family, about your sister and about you, if you’d be okay with that?” 

“Well, I’ve always been a sweetheart. It just takes longer for people to see it now because of Joseph," Amir said with a laugh. “I haven’t had anyone to talk to about my sister in a long time. I look forward to telling you all about her. Maybe a trip to Lebanon is in order.”

“Aw, you boys love each other,” Jaz replied. “It’s cute, and you’re both sweethearts. Joseph talks a big game and acts all tough, but he’s a big teddy bear.”

Both Jaz and Amir shook their heads in amusement.

“I'd love to go to Lebanon with you," Jaz said. "You know, I don’t think I’ve ever been there outside of work. I guess I was waiting for my own personal tour guide.” 

“Lebanon it is then."

***

They talked for another hour before ending their dinner with an argument over who would pay. Amir won that argument. 

As they walked back to their hotel, Amir wrapped his arms around Jaz, and Jaz leaned into him.

Amir, being the gentleman that he is, walked Jaz to her room and made sure she got in okay. As she unlocked her door Amir pulled Jaz into a hug and whispered into her ear, “You’re never alone. You will always be safe with me.” Jaz relaxed in his arms and pulled him even closer to her.

Amir felt tears hit his neck and it brought tears to his own eyes now. He knew Jaz was hurting but he had never realized how much. He had wanted to talk to her after she had talked to Xander. Then their last mission was FUBAR, and Preach and Patricia ended up in the hospital, and it never seemed like the right time. He knew enough about Jaz to know that she wouldn’t have opened up until they were stateside. Jaz started to pull away, shaking Amir from his thoughts.

Jaz gave Amir a kiss on the cheek and said goodnight.


	2. Chapter 2

The next day Amir and Jaz had their individual debriefs. That's the day they realized how much they needed each other. 

Jaz tried to remember everything that Xander had taught her. For her the hardest part was not talking about what Arthur did to her, the hardest part was talking about what her guys had to do to save her. They hadn’t even known that she was still alive, but they came anyways. She felt so much guilt because she couldn't get her part of the job done. She never doubted that they would save her, but she felt guilt because they had to put their lives in danger just to save her. She's still not used to having people or family care about her. She's reminded that not all of them made it out of Iran alive. What Houssain did for her, for the team, for Adam, makes her wonder what she did to deserve such love. She wished she could go back and change things, but knowing that was an impossible task she had set forth on a new path. In honor of Elijah and Houssain she decided to make the best of her life. 

***

Amir sat outside enjoying the brisk spring air. In about ten minutes he has to head inside for his debrief. His mind wonders to his sister and how he wished she could have met his team. His new family. He knows that his sister would have loved Jaz. While he's nervous to show Jaz where and how he grew up, he's also excited to share his memories of his sister. Amir looks down at his watch. Time to head in. He takes a deep breath and heads toward the elevators. 

The ride in the elevator was filled with thoughts about how Jaz's debrief went. Wishing he could have been there for her. He paces outside the meeting room. Finally, Jaz opens the door and the look in her eyes says it all. He wants to wrap her up in his arms, but he knows this is not the time or place. He gave Jaz a kiss on the forehead and walked into the meeting room. 

***

Jaz avoids her team. She needs space to clear her head, so she leaves the DIA and walks around for an hour. She knows she wants to continue operating and serving but that takes a toll on you. She decided that no big decisions were going to be made today. She made her way back to where Amir was waiting for her. 

***

Amir finishes his debrief. He had forgotten how draining they can be. He just wants this day to end. He opens the door and isn't surprised to see Jaz waiting for him. He smiles and takes her hand. They walked out holding hands, right past their team who wanted to make sure they both were ok. Both of them smiled and waved at the team and laughed at everyone's faces. The utter shock had Jaz and Amir crying from laughing so hard. At least some laughs today were better than none. They know they have a long night ahead, but they will face it together.

***

It was decided that they will share a hotel room for the remainder of their time in D.C. After the long, emotional day they have had, they ordered take-out and had Amir settled into their room now. With dinner done they took turns getting ready for bed in the bathroom. It's really no different than living on base. Jaz let Amir pick the movie which had Jaz laughing uncontrollably. His choice being his favorite western Blazing Saddles. Amir started the movie and they both got comfy on the same bed. As the movie went on Jaz had moved so that she was laying on Amir's arms. Both falling asleep, Amir turned his head and gave Jaz a kiss on her forehead. Jaz whispered, "Goodnight Amir. Thanks for never leaving me." They lock eyes. "You're most welcome, love,” Amir replied. Amir pulls her closer and they both fall asleep peacefully until something unexpected jolts them awake. 

At 2 am they awake to banging on the door. Being that it's Jaz's hotel room, Amir had her answer the door. They both grabbed their guns, as they are still on high alert after their last mission. Jaz looks through the peephole and sees a very drunk McG. Jaz puts down her gun and gives Amir the signal to put his gun down, too. Jaz is officially pissed. She was finally sleeping without nightmares. 

Amir sees the tension and anger in her body language. Now he's pissed at McG, too. After the day they had, they needed some quality rest. Amir stayed back and sat in one of the chairs while Jaz opened the door. 

As soon as she opened the door McG stumbled into the room. Jaz catches him before he falls. "McG, what are you doing here at 2 am and why are you drunk?” asked Jaz. “You have to be up at 6 am for your debrief." 

"Well, you see here, Jazzy, I went out looking for some fun but there weren't any takers. Can you believe that?" Jaz shook her head at McG and walked him to the first bed in her room. She pushed him down and got him out of his shoes and got him undressed and under the covers. All this without McG not noticing Amir sitting at the table. As she said goodnight he grabbed her hand and said, "I'm sorry we couldn't save you sooner." And with that he was asleep. 

With one sentence he managed to shatter the makeshift peace that Jaz and Amir had found after an emotional day. Jaz looked at Amir with tears in her eyes. She wasn't the only one hurting and she knew that, but it was another thing to hear it from her guys. Her guys didn't think twice about saving her. It wasn't even a choice for them. Nobody gets left behind. Amir knew and could see the shame and guilt creep back into Jaz. He grabbed her hand and grounded her back in the present. Knowing that McG wasn't going to hear them, Amir guided them back to their bed. He asked Jaz if she wanted to talk. She shook her head no. They turned off the tv and lights, and crawled into bed with Amir holding Jaz in his arms until she cried herself to sleep. Saying a silent prayer for his team, Amir went to sleep. 

***

Both Jaz and Amir wake up before their alarms. They wanted to let McG sleep for as long as possible. Amir had stepped out for breakfast and Jaz called Top and told him about last night. Top said he would take the morning debrief so McG could sleep and talk to Jaz. McG woke up at 10 am while Amir was running errands for Jaz and himself. Amir knew that Jaz had seen through his lie but she knew that this conversation had to be just her and McG. McG showered and wondered how he had a change of clothes. Jaz just sat back and grinned. That's all he needed to know. 

"So what happened last night?" Jaz asked. 

"I ummm … do we have to do this?" McG asked, trying to get out of this conversation.

Jaz just gave a raised eyebrow and a chuckle. "Nope. So either you tell me now or later, but you will be telling me. I've been working through Iran with Xander and Amir, but who have you talked to?" Jaz said. 

McG was in shock that Jaz wanted to talk about what happened. What he didn't know is that she needed to talk about this. 

"I'll start and tell you that I feel guilty that you all had to come save me. I didn't get my part of the job done. You could have died but you came anyways," Jaz said to McG with shame and awe in her voice. 

"Jaz, it was never a choice for us and you know that. DIA wanted us to walk. Top wasn't the first person who fought for you. It was Patricia. Once she gave the go ahead we made plans. To save you we as a team had to use unorthodox methods. I mean, Adam shot a guy just to get info to save you. I had to walk away. Do you know how hard that was for me as a medic?”  
McG started crying and Jaz held him. "I know. I hate what you all had to do to save me. I don't think I was worth it," Jaz replied. 

McG looked at Jaz like she had three heads. Jaz held her hands up and said, "I know what I just said is crazy to you. But seeing and hearing the team's pain is hard for me. All I ever wanted to do was protect you all. And this was the second time I failed you. Xander and Amir have been helping me through my pain and thoughts. I hope I can help you through yours." 

Again McG looked at Jaz like she was an alien. "Who are you and what have you done with my Jaz?”

Jaz laughed and said, "Been here the whole time. I just needed some help to get me to open up. Top also talks to Xander. You should too, Doc. You take care of us but who takes care of you?" Jaz asked. 

"I talk to my mom," McG said.

"Oh do you now? I get calls from your mom when you don't call her after three weeks," Jaz countered his lie.

"I try to call her but I don't want to be a burden on her. She has done so much for me. I mean she raised me on her own. I'm a grown man now. I don't need to lay my baggage on my mom," McG said. 

Jaz slapped the back of his head. "Idiot, she doesn't care about your baggage. She will carry that weight as long as she gets to talk to her baby. She knows more than you think. She talks to all of us. She's like our team mom. We tell her as much as we can. Most of us didn't have good role models growing up. You had a great role model. Reach out to her. She misses you." Jaz never thought she would have to set McG straight. 

"McG just call her and be honest," Jaz said.

"I will, Jaz. I promise after my debrief. I could use a good talk with Mom."

"You better or I'll call Mom," Jaz said with an evil laugh. 

"You wouldn't?" McG asked.

Jaz just laughed more.

Oh she would totally tattle on him to his own mother. This day is really going to suck.


End file.
